Parallax Maps

[Renzatic]

I was also kidding about people talking about me behind my back. But man...seems like I hurt some feelings when I left.

 

What happened back when, my leaving suddenly and whatnot, wasn't exactly planned. In essence, it was procrastination to the point of ridiculousness. I remember spending a huge amount of time in front of the computer, trying to do stuff I wasn't quite able to do, and nothing I did satisfied me. I kept going at it, never being happy with the results, and after awhile, I burnt myself out. I thought I'd take a week off, approach it fresh, and start again. Well, a week became two weeks, two weeks became a month, and so on and so on until I came to the conclusion that I had pretty much quit the mod. NH PMed me a few times, I told him I intended to do something...and soon, but when it came down to me sitting in front of the comp to do it, I realized I had lost all my enthusiasm for anything involving texturing, mapping, or modeling.

 

When spend hours and hours doing something, and you end up totally dissatisfied with the results, you turn around and start something else, go through the same thing...like I said, it burns you out.

 

It was a pretty shitty thing for me to do. I realized it even then. But when I looked back and saw it'd been so many months since I last posted, saw that I had a job that ate up all the free time I used to have, saw that I so many other things on my plate at that point, I just said screw it, knew you'd all get on fine without me, and went and did other things without saying a word. I always intended on coming back, anyway. I just wanted to come back when I felt I was good enough.

 

Since then, I'd pick up Lightwave and Photoshop, go through a flurry of activity for a week or so, drop it for a month or so, pick it up and do it again. I got a little bit better in that long stretch of time. Not as good as I would've been if I stuck at it, though. Eventually, I came to the conclusion I should just jump right back in and let nature take it's course. And now...here I am.

 

There you have it, the psychological drama/pity play/sob story that took place on my end of my departure from the mod. And of course, my apologies.

[Domarius]

Huh... but you were doing awesome looking maps from what I remember. We were all happy with them, how come you were so dissatisfied?

 

It wasn't the oDDity syndrome I hope - "Gah I'm not doing anything new and interesting and am not in total control of everything, this is getting boring... I'm sure working on a REAL project doesn't feel like this..." hahah...

[Renzatic]

No. I'm just an overly picky bastard. It's kinda like I have OCD, but it doesn't manifest itself in my everyday life, only when I'm doing maps and textures. If I can't make what I want to make, and get it to look as good as I want it to, I'll toss it.

[Dram]

No. I'm just an overly picky bastard. It's kinda like I have OCD, but it doesn't manifest itself in my everyday life, only when I'm doing maps and textures. If I can't make what I want to make, and get it to look as good as I want it to, I'll toss it.

 

This sounds so damn familiar with Blackheart Manor. I re-did the courtyard 8 times, no joke. Entry Hall re-did 3 times. It goes on.

[sparhawk]

You're all talking about me behind my back now? Damn.

 

Of course. I guess half of the posts in our forum are dedicated to you vanishing.

 

Nice to see you back. I always felt sorry for you going away, because you are really good.

 

And we also had a lot of fun, back when it started.

[New Horizon]

No. I'm just an overly picky bastard. It's kinda like I have OCD, but it doesn't manifest itself in my everyday life, only when I'm doing maps and textures. If I can't make what I want to make, and get it to look as good as I want it to, I'll toss it.

 

In doing so, there is no doubt a ton of usable work being lost. There comes a time as an artist, where you have to know where to draw the line between what is needed and what is perfection. Perfection is impossible as that is going to change over time. Work I've done and considered nearly perfect at the time is now flawed a year later. I've seen your work, and I don't think it's a matter of you getting any better for our needs...it's a matter of letting go.

 

I lost a great voice actor last week because of the very same thing. He was booked in to come over and record a voice set, and he bailed at the last minute because he felt his accent wasn't perfect. I told him it didn't have to be perfect...but that didn't seem to matter. I had heard him do an accent before and it WAS perfect...for our needs.

 

Seriously, it's like an anorexic looking in the mirror. They might be nothing but skin and bones, but in their reflection, they're never skinny enough. This is coming from someone who was anorexic for awhile in his teens.

[Tels]

In doing so, there is no doubt a ton of usable work being lost. There comes a time as an artist, where you have to know where to draw the line between what is needed and what is perfection. Perfection is impossible as that is going to change over time. Work I've done and considered nearly perfect at the time is now flawed a year later. I've seen your work, and I don't think it's a matter of you getting any better for our needs...it's a matter of letting go.

 

I lost a great voice actor last week because of the very same thing. He was booked in to come over and record a voice set, and he bailed at the last minute because he felt his accent wasn't perfect. I told him it didn't have to be perfect...but that didn't seem to matter. I had heard him do an accent before and it WAS perfect...for our needs.

 

Seriously, it's like an anorexic looking in the mirror. They might be nothing but skin and bones, but in their reflection, they're never skinny enough. This is coming from someone who was anorexic for awhile in his teens.

 

Speaking of voices, had you time to get the recordings done and upload them? Or do you need help?

[Renzatic]

I've seen your work, and I don't think it's a matter of you getting any better for our needs...it's a matter of letting go.

 

My work then and my work now are entirely different things to me. Back then, I was only rarely satisfied with my stuff. Mapwise, I'd think my architecture was too simple, textures...I'd think the diffuse maps were either too busy or too generic, and I never liked my normals. Nowadays, I can throw a complete texture together in an hour or so and be happy with the results, normals and all.

 

I did need to take a break and get some perspective. Coming back to it all fresh has helped me out a ton. Thing is, I should've just taken off for a couple of weeks, not a couple of years. Cuz now, here I am, pretty good, but not as good as I could've been if I stuck with it.

 

Would've, could've, should've. Hindsight is 20/20. Other cliches. I'm back now, albeit in a less exclusive capacity. I've already got 3 textures in what is hopefully gonna be a big, content-rich set done today.

 

Also, you people can straight up lay on a guilt trip like I've never seen before.

[Ishtvan]

Pack the bags, we're goin' on a guilt trip!

[Renzatic]

SET SAIL FOR SHAME!

[Komag]

hey all, I just wanna see more parallax!

[Renzatic]

I've put the parallax maps on the backburner for the time being. Most of the textures I'm making right now won't benefit much from it, anyway.

 

But if you still want to see something, this is what I've been working on for the past couple of days. Another hallway! HELL YEAH! I do halls so good.

 

This isn't all I'm doing, all your seeing here is the base. I'll be fleshing it out and getting some meshes in there to go along with it once I have some free time.

 

I'll be uploading them to Judith's site as soon as I figure out how to upload stuff to Judith's site. If you all want them, I can go ahead and toss them your way. All my texture testing is done in Doom 3, so I've got the material files and everything ready to roll.

Edited August 28, 2008 by Renzatic

[Springheel]

That would be great. The wall looks terrific.

[peter_spy]

I'll be uploading them to Judith's site as soon as I figure out how to upload stuff to Judith's site.

 

When I'll be back from work I'll give you ftp access to your own texture folder and author status, as well as some short posting guidelines, to make it all clean and simple

Edited August 28, 2008 by Judith

[HappyCheeze]

Wow that looks amazing!

 

And Ren, you're not the only one who is nitpicking their own work. I do get overcritical of my own work, ask any artist. My friend is really good at drawing, and she drew this awesome picture and I was like "Woah thats sweet!" And she was like "It looks like crap! here take it, I don't want to look at it anymore."

 

It effects us all in this area (mappers, texture artists, sound, modelers). And sometimes a good break helps.

[peter_spy]

I sent you an email with login details, Ren. You can start posting/uploading. Now, where was I... *gets back to playing Mission X*

[jdude]

A long time ago, I made this hallway to test out some textures and goof around with making things look cool (blackthief did the the lamps, and of course Oddity did the character model). I had all this stuff backed up, but apparently I used cheap CDs to do the archiving, and they went transparent on me over time. Thusly, I can't get them anymore, and I need to come here to ask someone if they can find one particular texture for me...

 

That green plaster wall.

 

I have no idea who you are But that is a great shot and you should consider TDM again We have a ton more textures and models than whenever you were around.

[New Horizon]

Renz was one of the team leads awhile back, one of the founding fathers. In any case, he has always been welcome to return when he felt rested enough.

[HappyCheeze]

I say you're good, and you should continue your work :-)

[Renzatic]

In any case, he has always been welcome to return when he felt rested enough.

 

Man, you make it sound like I've been convalescing at a nursing home these last few, all scootching around on a Hoveround and playing Bingo with the blue haired ladies.

 

Well I have been. But now I'm back. Tanned, rested, and ready. I've got my falsies in and I'm ready to ROLL, SON, ROLL! If you don't mind, go ahead and make me a contributor.

[New Horizon]

If you don't mind, go ahead and make me a contributor.

 

Will do.

[Renzatic]

Thanks much.

[Domarius]

Awesome

[DigitalNapalm]

Man, you make it sound like I've been convalescing at a nursing home these last few, all scootching around on a Hoveround and playing Bingo with the blue haired ladies.

 

Well I have been. But now I'm back. Tanned, rested, and ready. I've got my falsies in and I'm ready to ROLL, SON, ROLL! If you don't mind, go ahead and make me a contributor.

 

...hoveround...bingo... OMG! LOL

[Tels]

Man, you make it sound like I've been convalescing at a nursing home these last few, all scootching around on a Hoveround and playing Bingo with the blue haired ladies.

 

Well I have been. But now I'm back. Tanned, rested, and ready. I've got my falsies in and I'm ready to ROLL, SON, ROLL! If you don't mind, go ahead and make me a contributor.

 

ROFL You should write out readmes, announcements and so on!